A few nights ago I was headed to a friends screening of his show called, "My Mother Thinks I'm Cool". I dug it, but my story takes place after the screening.
My friend Cassandra had joined me for the night, which was set at the King King in Hollywood. Great joint by the way if you've never been. ANYhow, after the screening I was soooooo hungry so I asked her if she wanted to grab a bite. She said she had just eaten before she came, but that she would come along anyways. I said, "no way, I'd feel rude eating in front of you when you're just sitting there!" She insisted. I insisted. This went on for a while until she said she would get a shake or dessert as well. It was settled, so we headed on our way.
Our conversation, as I recall, was headed in a direction that I know better to lead it down (as far as my part is concerned which I will now share to you). Somehow we got into the conversation of growing old which I responded to her by saying, "I don't want to grow old, I want to I die before then." Such a brash, uncalled for, unadvised, and ignorant thing to say. Yes I know. I apologize for even repeating it in a story. And yes, she called me out on it. Apparently, god did as well because at that moment I notice a small white object fall from the sky and pelt me right on the left shoulder. Confused and curious, I look. "What the!? ...Aw man!"
I announced, "a bird just shit on me!"
I was bewildered, amused, and a little embarrassed I admit. I mean, at night? Really? What the heck is that bird doing up that late!? ...nevermind, I guess the answer is obvious. At this point I start laughing and make a huge scene about it. She interjects, "See, someone's trying to tell you something" (referring to my blasphemous comment). Immediately I agreed. Gave thanks and apologized, but I was still making a scene of it. That's when I told her, "you know, Colombians believe it's good luck when you get crapped on by a bird." She made a face. "So do Italians!" I argued.
She made her case, "I think your just trying to make yourself feel better for what happened."
We laughed about it and I declared that I was going to buy a lottery ticket first thing the next day. And you know what? I did just that.
While I was getting my car filled up with gas, which the prices are highway robbery by the way (like you didn't know already), I bought the first lottery ticket that caught my eye. It had something about "luck" written on it. I thought it was fitting. I was in a rush, so I didn't get to scratch it until the end of the day. In doing so I find that our poop-wielding feathered friend had just won me 15 bucks!! I was literally laughing aloud by myself. As the mature adult that I am, I naturally texted Cassandra gloating about my fortunate incident. She made a comment suggesting she had a rightful ownership of some of the loot. Being that that money wasn't mine in the first place I agreed to share the wealth.
On a final note, that night at the diner, she didn't end up buying any dessert!
